Imagine yourself in that salsa club for the first time: the music is loud, upbeat and with great energy and everyone is dressed in a fashionable way. As you walk in, you approach the dance floor. Here is when you are truly introduced to the world of salsa. You stare at the dancers as you see dancing, executing all these amazing turns; how they dance with passion, the sexiness, and then again, the turns! The never-ending, fun turn!!
Sound like your experience? It was definitely mine, so right away I knew I had to learn how to dance.
Once I started dancing, the better I saw myself dancing, the more I noticed that some girls did not enjoy dancing with me or they’d just flat out say no every time I asked them to dance. Why? After all I was doing all the turns and dips, the sexy patterns, the fun stuff – you know, the works.
It was after some time that I truly learned what makes a guy a great dancer:
“ When you dance salsa, you don’t make the girl do the turns, you guide her”.
This observation alone is very general, but it opens the door to help you understand dancing in a new way. Leading is the key to being a great dancer. Let’s dive in to see how you can improve the way you play your role on the dance floor as a leader.
Here are my tips:
LEADING VS. MAKING.
Most girls will be familiar with guys making you do the turns and combinations. After all, when you go home after a night of salsa dancing, you feel that your whole body is sore as you if were beaten by a gang of wild monkeys. Guys! Lead as if you were showing the way, not as if you were making her play catch up. It’s ok to be toned and firm, guys, but not rough. There is a line between those two concepts and believe me, it’s not a fine one. There is a big difference when it comes down to making versus leading. Want to know what kind of lead you are? Do a survey among the girls you dance with. They’ll be happy to tell you.
BE SPECIFIC.
This one baffles me: the guy places the hand up and somehow, by magic, he expects the girl to turn. What king of dance instructor teaches this concept to their students? Every move has to be specific guys. If you want to move a chair from point A to B, you have to make it happen right? So lead as if you were making the turn happen. But remember: guide vs. make. Be assertive in your moves as if she were to close her eyes and still be able to follow you.
PUT YOURSELF IN HER SHOES.
Guys, guys, guys!! If she is falling after the same turn patterns, or she feels uncomfortable with some of your moves, then don’t do them. Try combinations and moves that help the girl feel more comfortable, and are at her level of dancing. Always adapt to her, without expecting her to adapt to you. It’s funny to see some guys doing the same endless turns until the girl is falling down. You guys, this is not your signal to stop those turns. If she is loosing her balance, don’t keep going on and on.
IMPROVE YOUR LEAD VS. SHE DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO FOLLOW.
Changing this perspective will help you see opportunities to be better at leading. Often times, I hear guys make comments like: “I don’t like dancing with her, she can’t follow”. Instead why don’t you say to yourself: “What can I do to improve my lead in this particular move, so that she can follow it next time?” After all you want to improve as a lead right? Then start by working on yourself. Thinking this way helps you be the guy who can lead everybody. And ladies will enjoy dancing with you because of that.
BE CLOSER TO HER.
Let me put it in other words: be within reach. Dance at a distance that will make it easy for you as a lead so you don’t have to be running after her. I suggest a one-foot distance between your body and hers as you dance. You will feel more in control and this will help her feel your lead. In addition to this, don’t over extend your arms when you dance, especially in your open breaks. This creates extra distance between you and your partner, making it hard to reach or lead the next move.
BE IN TUNE WITH THE WAY HER BODY FEELS AS SHE DANCES.
Pay attention to how she feels, her movement, her momentum, her resistance, her body language, her distance, and her styling. You will be able to place combinations and moves that flow and fit the moment versus placing moves or combos for the sake of the move.
PAY ATTENTION TO THE MUSIC.
If you don’t, you are just going through the motion – you are not dancing. Remember that we dance to the music, and so does the girl. You will also be able to coordinate your moves better, and trust me, your dancing will improve dramatically.
LEARN HOW TO BE AN EFICIENT LEAD, AND THEN APPLY STYLING.
Many guys out there get so into the moves and styling that they end up forgetting about leading the girl, or end up confusing her. Sometimes styling can interfere with the girl’s following, so be aware of it. Assertive leading helps you be in tune with your dance partner. Do you feel in tune with the people you dance with or are you just dancing with yourself?
KEEP LEARNING.
Learn other dances: It improves your favorite dance. Think you know it all? Then you must be a world champion and everyone enjoys dancing with you! Not your case? Not to worry! We can all improve and learn new things, even as a professional dancer I will always continue learning. Take some privates, work on your technique and try learning a new dance.
And the final one:
LEARN HOW TO FOLLOW.
This is the best thing you could do, if you are really serious about dancing. Do you really want to be exceptionally good at leading? Then practice following. Take your dancing to the next level and understand dancing from the follower’s perspective. True leaders know how followers feel. What better way to know than by being one?
All these little tips will help you get there as a great leader. And always remember: when it comes down to being a successful dancer, the stronger the foundations, the better you will be able to build upon them. So get to it!
For more information on this and related topic, www.estebanconde.com . I offer private salsa dance instruction to all of Orange County.
Bloch is carried here as well,...
Very insightful post on the basics of salsa dancing.
I guess that salsa is a very interactive dance and therefore, like the old saying goes – ‘it takes two to tango’, but yea it also ‘takes two to salsa’. I am currently doing salsa basics and my teacher said this before ‘You get to know your partner much more in 5 minutes in salsa dancing than 60 minutes of conversation’.
The most important should be – confidence in leading and know what you’re really doing.
Nice post, i’m getting some ideas for my hip hop dance website as well.
Cheers!
Good stuff. This is very timely. A little reminder of what I need to polish.
In regards to “BE CLOSER TO HER”. What I have noticed is if you look into your partner’s eyes you will naturally position yourself at a comfortable distance. And it also become intimate.
Great stuff. This kind of material puts the lead into the right mindset.
Just one jarring issue: LEARN HOW TO BE AN EFICIENT LEAD, AND THEN APPLY STYLING.
Please spell efficient correctly especially on a title!
I found that when you focus and became a great lead, the dance combinations come in an easy way, they truly flows, and girls enjoy will enjoy dancing with you. Take care of your lady and she will take care of you. I am happy to see that is helping many of you to became more efficient dancers. Keep it up guys!
I’m at the stage where I need to improve my lead. And for me it’s being able to control my gentleness. Girls tell me that most guys pull and end up breaking the girls arms. So I need to remember to be gentle.
Also, I try to use the girl to control my timing. Sometimes I go too fast. So I try to let the girl finish her move, then the rest is the pause, then when ready start the next pattern.
I’m primarily more into the hip hop dance style, i’m wondering if i can put the basics of salsa-leading (as suggested by this post) to other dance style. Especially when hip hop dancing is more individualistic – probably leading the audiences.
I’m getting a little hazy.
But yeah great news, I’ve tried focusing on leading in my salsa class today, I feel that the dynamics were WAY BETTER!
cheers!
Thanks! By the way – first thought: http://splicd.com/crxrx16v_cQ/0/4
Principles of war can be applied to dancing.
-Know your enemy (your mate)
-Know yourself (your movements and style)
-Choose the battlefield and take your enemy there (lead her)
-Surprise factor (use your leadership to surprise her of what she can achieve)*
*Every time a girl tells me she’s surprised of how she can dance with me (e.g. “I dance very well with you”, “You’re the first with whom I figure out how to do this figure/movement”), it’s a great compliment!
I’ve really enjoyed this article!! Each point is 100% true. As a follower, Ive seen myself doing nice combinations just by following the “hints” and body movements of a good lead. On the other hand, I’ve seen myself confused on a simple CBL (hahaha~kidding!! just and example!!) Oh! But my favorite has to be the time an “advance” dancer thought that I would follow better if he forcefully thru me around. >:( I learned not to dance with that guy EVER again!
Eh, we got a girl here. Man, I feel like I’m on a dating website now. LOL!!!
I’m an advanced student, but I just started practicing seriously about 4 months ago. I kept asking girls I was dancing with if they knew what they were doing when it turns out it was me. Well after 4 months of practicing and a couple of private lessons, things are looking freaking good.
I still question sometimes if its me or my partner who’s at fault, but trying to do the best lead that I can.
But a hint to the ladies, if the leader is hard on you say something. I was lucky enough for a girl to say something to me about 4 months ago about my lead and rhythm.
Lil’ advise: no movements questions to the lady when you’re dancing. If you make or she makes some mistake, just smile and repeat the movement until you fix it or she understands it. If you want even you can explain her how to do something.
If there is some mistake, there is a 95% chance of man’s fault. Remember, you’re leading! Matter of marks.
I’m surprised at the omission of one of the most important points – Communication! Partner dancing is all about communication, and that involves eye contact as well as body contact. Extra points for both smiling and eye contact. Followers making mistakes? Happens all the time, but this is dancing, not a matter of life and death. When a partner apologizes for making a mistake, or not picking up a lead, I smile at her, and say, “relax, this isn’t a test.” Dollars to donuts she gets the move on the next try, (and more than half the time, I get her phone number). There’s technical skill, and then there’s the skill of being a good dance partner.
The advice of tuning into your partner is also very important. Early in a dance, I read whether she wants a stronger or more gentle lead, a faster or slower pace, a more sensual or more athletic interaction, and change my lead accordingly.
This is turning out to be a wicked topic.
Something I have been thinking about just recently and Salsaholic just reminded me is that when dancing with a new girl, start simple and slowly add more complex moves as the song progresses. Sometimes I’ll add a complex move 4 moves in and she gets already lost and then it’s just downhill from there.
It’s one of the many things I’m working on currently.
Any resemblance with sex is entirely coincidental, haha. You’re right, you HAVE TO act the song, this is very important for a good performance. Not just a leader but also a an actor on the dance floor. Music is your director.
I love very much when girls act and seduce you as long you’re dancing with them. That motivate you to do more daring movements.
One thing I did forget to mention is that no matter how good a lead or follower you are, you have to enjoy it and dance and hafe fun with the dance with your partner. Many times I dance with girls that have an “I am all that” attitude, and there is this dry look on them, like staring at an empty spot, never looking at you or even smilling. No matter how good the follower in this case, the dance is flavorless. Same for the guys.
One other thing which affects both lead and follower that I have noticed in my dancing is how the lead handles the followers arm (assuming one hand is free). It is that when exiting a turn to be sure that the arm is placed properly so that the follower knows what the next move will be.
I attribute the follower’s arm to a gear shift. Raise it above her head and she turns. Bring it down and she moves in closer. Pull on it and she breaks out. But keep it at a 90 degree angle and she will exit a turn facing you.
I totally agree with Esteban. You have to enjoy the dance. It sure is nice when a girl can follow like a pro, but even if she can’t, lead her through some easy patterns and make her have a good time. Smile. Laugh if you mess up. Salsa is as much about having fun and enjoying the music as it is about dancing. You will get so much more dances and salsa-scene status if you make sure you take care of the girls.
On another point, I cannot emphasize enough how important leading with your frame/posture is, especially on more advanced patterns. I see too many dancers try to lead various patterns with only their arms. You may be able to get away with it if the girl knows what she’s doing, but you’d be surprised to see just how much better a girl follows you when you’re using your whole body and frame to lead, rather than just your hands.
Kudos to Gallo!!
Ok, I was doing fine until Gallo’s second paragraph. A girl made mention of this last Wednesday when I danced with her and did this one move when she said I had to lead with my body.
This goes back to the same issue with leading with the hands softly. How to lead with your body without giving her a bear hug or feeling like the breeze.
And I was doing so well.
Dear Donv:
Leading with your body has nothing to do with the the level of tone or resistance of your body.You can have a stronger tone or softer and still be able to lead with your body. And by body, we mean, upper body. The best way to explain and understand this is a punch. If you punch someone, the energy and action comes from yuor body (pects, shoulders). You use your upper body to initiate the movement, then the arm delivers. So for example, in a cross body lead, instead of leading with just your arms, try conectiong your arms more to your pectoral muscles. Feel that your arm joint starts there, instead of your shoulders. Then initiate the movement from your upper body. You then will see how moving and direction with your uper body delivers a smotther feeling, and also a stronger lead. You will be amazed and surprise of the resultss and this alone will open a new chapter in your dancing growth.
Wow!!!! Good explanation, Esteban. Thank You.
very nice article, that is not just about dancing, is a leadership concept that follow in the military as well.